Guild Scape

Where Scape Guilds go!
 
HomeHome  PortalPortal  CalendarCalendar  GalleryGallery  FAQFAQ  SearchSearch  MemberlistMemberlist  UsergroupsUsergroups  RegisterRegister  Log inLog in  

Share | 
 

 Thread for jokes etc etc enjoy ill start with my most loved quotes

Go down 
AuthorMessage
Thunderspeed
Elitest
Elitest
avatar


Number of posts : 160
Registration date : 2009-03-17
Age : 25
Location : Sligo,Ireland

PostSubject: Thread for jokes etc etc enjoy ill start with my most loved quotes   Thu Mar 19, 2009 2:37 pm

Dwarf female
• "I like my ale like I like my men: Dark and rich."
Dwarf male
• "Hi hooo, hi hooo... ehh, uhh, second verse, same as the first."
• "I don't have a drinkin' problem! I drink, I get drunk, I fall down. No problem!"
• "I don't drink anymore... course, I don't drink any less either!"
• "Oh, I'm just a social drinker. Every time someone says, 'I'll have a drink', I say, 'So shall I'!"
Gnome female
• "I apologize profusely for any inconvenience my murderous rampage may have caused."
• "You know... squirrels can be deadly when cornered."
• "Some day, I hope to find the nuggets on a chicken."
Gnome male
• "I had an idea for a device that you could put small pieces of bread in to cook, but in the end I really didn't think there'd be much of a market for it."
• "I look bigger in those mirrors where things look bigger."
Human female
• "Do you ever feel like you're not in charge of your own destiny, like... you're being controlled by an invisible hand?"
Human male
• "So, an orc walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender says 'Hey, where'd you get that?' The parrot says 'Durotar. They've got them all over the place.' "
• "So, I have this idea for a great movie. It's about two gnomes who find a bracelet of power, and they have to take it to the Burning Steppes and cast it into the Cauldron. They form the Brotherhood of the Bracelet. Along the way they're trailed by a murloc named Gottom, who's obsessed with the bracelet, and nine bracelet bogeymen. It could be a three-parter, called 'Ruler of the Bracelet'. The first part would be called 'The Brotherhood of the Bracelet', followed by 'A Couple of Towers', with the climactic ending called 'Hey, the King's Back!'
Night Elf female
• "You know, I have to keep moving at night. Or I'll disappear!"
• "I think guys just use the Emerald Dream as an excuse to avoid calling me back."

Night Elf male
• "Is that thing sharp? Could that thing cut me? I'm... not immortal now you know."
• "I don't know about you, but I can't understand a thing those Wisps say. I usually just nod."
• "I don't mind the Gnomes, but I'm always worried about tripping over one."
Draenei female
• "How exactly do you crash into a planet? That's what I want to know."
• "Single Draenei female seeks blacksmith with grinding wheel to take care of me and my gorgeous hooves."
• "'Stop and ask for directions,' I told him. But no, 'It's inter-dimensional,' he says. 'What can go wrong?'"
• "Do Gnomes have a vibrate setting? I'm just curious."
Draenei Male
• "We have it all figured out. Step One: We land the Exodar. Step Three: We defeat Legion and go home... there is only one detail missing."
• "When we arrived here I lost many jewels that had been in my family for generations. If you could get your hands on my family jewels I would be deeply appreciative."
• "We did not realize, but in Naaru language 'Exodar' means 'defective elekk turd'."
Horde
Forsaken female
• "Yes, they're REAL! They're not mine, but they're real!"
• "You know, once you're dead, nothin' smells bad anymore. Rotten eggs? No problem. Dead fish? Like a spring breeze."
Forsaken male
• "Roses are gray, violets are gray, I'm dead and colorblind."
• "Hey diddle diddle, the mucous and the spittle. The corpse sank in the lagoon. The murloc said 'mmmmm' to see such a sight, and the dwarf spanked the baboon."
• "Anyone have any odorant? Either 'Wet Dog', 'Fresh Garbage', or 'Low Tide' would do




Orc female
• "Darn, I need my chest waxed again!"
• "I'm very feminine. And I'll beat the crap out of ANYONE who disagrees!"
• "What's estrogen? Can you eat it?"
• "I have no respect for people with small piercings. I say go full hog. Put a spear through your head."
• "Get between me and my food, and you'll lose a hand."
Orc male
• "I will CRUSH and DESTROY and... ooo... shiny..."
Tauren female
• "One time I laughed so hard I milked all over the floor."
• "You know how hard it is to get your groove on with the spirit of your great grandmother watching over you?"
• "In my native tongue, my name is Dances with Tassels."
Tauren male
• "Y’know, Tauren are born hunters. You ever see a Tauren catch a salmon out of a stream? It really is quite exciting. You ever see a Tauren stalk a python? 'Course you haven't. That's because Tauren are so adept at blending in with their surroundings."
• "Here’s the beef!"
• "I know it seems strange, but I'm practically a cow, so why am I wearing leather?"
Troll female
• Da way to a man's heart is through his stomach, but I go through da ribcage!
• I feel pretty. Oh so pretty. <spitting sound>.
• If cannibalism be wrong, I don't want to be right!
Troll male

• "I heard if you cut off an extremity it'll regenerate a little bigger. Don't believe it."
• "I kill two dwarves in da morning, I kill two dwarves at night,
I kill two dwarves in the afternoon, and then I feel alright.
I kill two dwarves in time of peace and two in time of war,
I kill two dwarves before I kill two dwarves, and then I kill two more."


Blood Elf female
• "Ugh I hate Thunder Bluff! You can't find a good burger anywhere."
• "So I went to this troll spa the other day and I wound up with dreadlocks and a frigging bone in my nose! I mean come on! Who PAYS for that?"
• "I went to Undercity to get a facial. Ha! Have you seen these people? I said, 'You don't have a lower jaw and you're going to give ME a facial?' She got mad...at least I think she did. You ever heard someone talk without a lower jaw? 'Rawe-rau-werew' Ho-ho! She sounded like a murloc!"
• "Do you think the expansion will make me fat?"
• "How can I miss you if you don't go away?"
• "Mirrors can't talk. Luckily for you, they can't laugh either!"
• "I'm the girl the ESRB warned you about."
Blood Elf male
• "Give me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to... *angry grunt* Just give me some freakin' magic before I kill somebody!"
• "I'm trying to cut back on arcane magic... look, I got the patch."
• "We're allied with the Tauren? Fantastic! We'll be having steak twice a week."
• "So I was in line to the Bat Handler yesterday with some undead guy in front of me and all of the sudden he just lets one go! Didn't even try to disguise it! I don't know what he ate but it did not agree with him. I thought, 'What crawled up YOU and died'"?
• "The problem with these Horde characters is they lack sophistication. *farts*"


Thunderspeed
Jason
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Thunderspeed
Elitest
Elitest
avatar


Number of posts : 160
Registration date : 2009-03-17
Age : 25
Location : Sligo,Ireland

PostSubject: Re: Thread for jokes etc etc enjoy ill start with my most loved quotes   Thu Mar 19, 2009 2:39 pm

How do taruen hide in the woods ?
They paint there balls red and hide in apple trees.

have you ever seen a taurn in an apple tree ?
No ? IT WORKS !

How Did The Gnome Die ?
Picking Apples

Thunderspeed

Jason
Back to top Go down
View user profile
 
Thread for jokes etc etc enjoy ill start with my most loved quotes
Back to top 
Page 1 of 1
 Similar topics
-
» NJPW Thread
» Custom Chassis Build Thread
» The Costume Thread....
» Brisbane Track Class 11/02/11 Start Lists
» Favorite silly jokes!

Permissions in this forum:You cannot reply to topics in this forum
Guild Scape :: The Sand Box :: Entertainment-
Jump to: